To be quite honest, the writing of this entire book was a struggle. I opened up childhood wounds, and, in some cases, they were things I hadn’t shared in treatment or counseling. I began bleeding those stories onto the page. There were numerous triggers while writing the book and some nightmares reliving the abuse.
Maya Golden – 18 November 2023
The Back Flap
At age 30, Maya Golden appeared to be living a charmed life.
She was an award-winning sports reporter, a loyal wife, and a new mom. Outwardly, she was the picture of the American Dream for many women. Privately, she was battling addiction, perfectionism, dissociation disorder, and rage due to sexual abuse endured at the hands of her cousin and other predators.
After years of harboring pain and channeling her anger into unhealthy outlets, Maya wanted to change. So, on a family road trip back to her Texas hometown, she decided she was ready to put an end to the secrets that threatened her marriage and her career. Three separate moments of divine intervention ultimately saved Maya’s life.
From a suicide plan to treatment facility to launching a non-profit organization—Maya’s story chronicles and dissects her journey to show others that purpose can be made from trauma.
The Return Trip is the story of what happens to a girl when she develops the core belief that she only exists for the pleasure of other people. The Return Trip confronts head on the stigmas women face, especially women of color, with their own sexual identity, and is a rally cry for survivors that they can find self-esteem again after trauma.
About the book
When did you start writing the book?
I first began writing what would become The Return Trip in April 2019. The manuscript was originally a fictional adaptation of my own life story, with a main character named “Stacy.” I sent one query of that early version to an agent who declined it, and rightfully so. I put the book aside for several months before returning to it and deciding in the fall of that year that I was going to drop the pretense of telling my story as fiction and make it a memoir. I wanted the story to be authentic and helpful to survivors and their loved ones, and I felt the only way to do that was to be vulnerable and brutally honest on every page.
How long did it take you to write it?
With some breaks in the process, I began writing in earnest in February 2020 and stepped up my writing efforts in March, during quarantine of the early part of the Covid pandemic. I wrote the first seven chapters of the book and began to query it with a nonfiction book proposal. I received an offer for publishing from Rising Action Publishing Collective in October 2021. After signing my deal with RAPC, I wrote the rest of the memoir with their support for developmental edits and submitted the completed book in August 2022.
Where did you get the idea from?
In July 2015, I established a nonprofit organization, the 1 in 3 Foundation. It was through my foundation work that I began sharing my story publicly and speaking with other survivors. That was also two months after my release from a treatment facility for addiction and Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD). On my recovery journey, I was looking for a book, an open and honest shared experience written by a woman with sexual addiction, and found a market heavy with self-help or books written for a male audience. It led me to write the story I was looking for with the hope of helping others.
Were there any parts of the book where you struggled?
To be quite honest, the writing of this entire book was a struggle. I opened up childhood wounds, and, in some cases, they were things I hadn’t shared in treatment or counseling. I began bleeding those stories onto the page. There were numerous triggers while writing the book and some nightmares reliving the abuse. When I began writing about my days immersed in addiction, I began to crave those highs again. I relapsed while writing the book, but thanks to an amazing support system and mental health professionals, I have been able to stop pouring vinegar and salt into the wounds opened during the writing process and heal again. Recording the audiobook was also very difficult. Writing about the shame, guilt, and hurt of sexual abuse was difficult enough but when I began to narrate the audiobook, I was speaking things out loud that my younger self had kept silent. I was letting the harmed little girl speak up.
I would encourage anyone looking to write about traumatic experiences to have a support system of mental health professionals and trusted family and friends in place before you begin writing the first sentence. It can be difficult to be so vulnerable for the sake of authenticity, even when your goal is to support others. Taking care of yourself as a human being first, an author second, is paramount.
What came easily?
Some of the parts that were easiest to write were those that focused on descriptions of Texas locations and Texans. Born and raised here, though this story focuses on my personal recovery and mental health, Texas is also a character in the book. From the landscape to the accents, I wanted to capture each part of the state depicted in the book with emphasis on East Texas, the Metroplex (Dallas/Fort Worth), and West Texas.
We all know how important it is for writers to read. Are there any particular authors that have influenced how you write and, if so, how have they influenced you?
My name of Maya was partly influenced by the great literary artist Maya Angelou, and her books and poems have been a constant inspiration in my life. The first time I read I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, in which she shared her own story of abuse and resulting sexual behaviors, I felt for the first time as a preteen holding that book that my story was not isolated. That is why it is so important for young audiences to have access to diverse books. My book is for a mature, adult audience, but I cannot imagine how differently I would have approached writing without her stories.
Chanel Miller’s Know My Name was also a large influence on the writing of The Return Trip. Her story encouraged me to be fearless in sharing my own.
Other authors that I love because of their writing styles, world building and the way they immerse you into their plots are Neil Gaiman, Suzanne Collins and Joanne Harris.
Do you have a target reader?
The Return Trip will appeal to survivors of sexual trauma struggling with mental health and in need of an inspirational story from an authentic voice speaking on relatable themes. Addicts entering or currently in recovery seeking an honest depiction of withdrawal, progression of symptoms, and treatment may also find the themes of the book relatable. But my goal in writing the book was to also reach a general audience of friends, family and colleagues of survivors who are interested in offering emotional support, empathy and social awareness. Based on the statistic that 1 in 3 women are survivors of physical or sexual violence (World Health Organization), everyone knows a survivor of sexual trauma. They are our mothers, sisters, cousins, nieces, friends, co-workers and classmates.
The book would also be useful for mental health care providers including counselors, therapists, nurses, psychologists, and psychiatrists looking to incorporate a real-life experience into their continuing education, as well as provide a better understanding of sexual trauma issues in the clients they serve in a less clinical presentation. It will also be helpful for staff and volunteers of advocacy and awareness organizations and local crisis centers wanting to obtain a better sense of the survivor experience, if that is not a part of their own life’s journey.
About Writing
Do you have a writing process? If so can you please describe it?
I am a mom, wife, nonprofit founder/executive and freelance journalist. To say I have a set writing schedule or daily writing habit would be a dream! The truth is, I have to make time to write when the work-life balance isn’t cooperative, and with the nature of this memoir, particularly revisiting traumatic childhood events, writing every day wasn’t feasible from a mental health standpoint either. I had to give myself grace to write some heavy and triggering topics and then take my foot off the gas for a few days before sitting down to write or edit.
When I do sit down to write, it is for hours at a time, sometimes more than eight hours in a sitting. I make tea or a cup of water, turn on my diffuser (citrus essential oils to elevate my mood) and the “Happy Light” on my desk, and I keep writing until the words no longer seem to flow naturally.
Do you outline? If so, do you do so extensively or just chapter headings and a couple of sentences?
Before writing The Return Trip, I was absolutely a pantser. I might have written a few bullet points of key events or dialogue I wanted to include in chapters in my fictional works, but I believe memoir as a genre does not lend itself to not being carefully thought out and well mapped. It required research and conversations with family members and then determining what elements were critical to the telling of the story. The Return Trip began as a book in chronological order and I quickly realized, I would lose readers along the journey. It wasn’t an autobiography and no one truthfully would care about what I did in the fourth grade. After working through the manuscript, I found the way to tell the story in Part 1 of the book was to connect a traumatic event from the past to the manifestation and repercussions of it in the present. So, the book moves from the past to present, past to present, before moving to more recent events. I found that showing the reader what happened to me as a child and then later showing me trying to cope with day-to-day life as an adult, would help them understand how Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) has multiple symptoms and impacts our relationships, behaviors, coping mechanisms and self-esteem. For my current works in progress, which are all fiction, I have found that outlining is extremely helpful in connecting the dots and making a thorough arc for the protagonist.
Do you edit as you go or wait until you’ve finished?
I cannot move on from a chapter without editing it. I will write a draft of a complete chapter, but before I can move on to the next chapter, I go back and look at areas I can fine tune, making sure I am showing and not telling, or expand upon descriptions and emotions. It is important for me to feel that chapter is as close to polished as it can be before I move on to write the next.
Do you listen to music while you write? If yes, what gets the fingers tapping?
I prefer silence when I write so that I can focus. However, when I was writing certain parts of this book, trying to connect with certain time periods (the 80s, 90s, early 2000s) before I sat down at the computer to write, I had some playlists and certain albums and songs that I listened to that help to mentally transport me back to those times. The music creates a connection with the memories of that time and I found inspiration from them before sitting down to write for those eras. I particularly enjoyed listening to 90s music, because music was an outlet for me during my teen years, and I found I still had the same emotions when listening to R&B, grunge, pop, house music, rap, etc.
About Publishing
Did you submit your work to Agents?
I did submit the partial manuscript to about a dozen literary agents. I received some positive feedback from a few but not offers for representation. I met a literary agent during a conference with a pitch-event and she asked that I send her the partial. We cultivated communication during the process of finalizing the first few chapters of the book. When she declined representation, I was understandably disappointed and brokenhearted. But the very next day, I picked myself up and decided to try again. I had heard Alexandria Brown on a podcast (The Shit No One Tells You About Writing) and that was how I learned more about indie publishing and Rising Action Publishing Collective (RAPC). On a Saturday, I submitted my query to Alex. An hour and a half later, I had an email saying they loved my first chapters and wanted to coordinate a call. By the end of the following week, I had an offer for publishing. It was a great reminder of the highs and lows of the process but we must keep going no matter how the rejections sting. I didn’t sign with RAPC because they were the first yes, but because they told me they believed in my story and that it would help others. That is how I knew it would be a great partnership!
Did you get your book cover professionally done or did you do it yourself?
Rising Action Publishing Collective had the cover for The Return Trip created by the talented Nat Mack.
Do you have a marketing plan for the book or are you just winging it?
When I submitted my nonfiction book proposal to Rising Action Publishing Collective, it included my marketing plans, my platform and professional network. It was extremely details and planned. I took a few workshops and courses on book marketing as well. It’s a great investment to help you understand that you need much more than a few social media posts to spread the word about your book and cultivate an audience.
Any advice that you would like to give to other newbies considering becoming Indie authors?
I whole-heartedly believe in the process of working with an indie publisher. They invest in you as an author, not only through developmental edits and copy edits, but the resources for marketing as well. There is also a personalized experience when working directly with the editors. They are there to help you carry the book from its infancy to a beautifully finished product. You have one-on-one time and expertise you might not gain elsewhere. I had not originally planned to query indie presses, but for my first steps in the publishing world, it has been a wonderful experience and I encourage others to consider submitting their work to independent publishers.
About You
Where did you grow up?
I was born in Dallas and grew up in the neighboring city of Garland, Texas.
Where do you live now?
Tyler, Texas
What would you like readers to know about you?
I am an Associated Press winning and Emmy-nominated freelance journalist where the nonprofit I established, 1 in 3 Foundation, serves survivors of sexual trauma with little to no income in East Texas and provides counseling and support services. For Salon, I’ve written about fandoms and healing, for Insider, I’ve written about sex addiction, and for Black Girl Nerds, I’ve written about CPTSD, Dissociative Disorders, and Marvel.
What are you working on now?
My first novel, a political thriller, The Senator, will release in April 2025 through Rising Action Publishing Collective. I am very excited to be working on with fiction after years as a journalist and writing creative nonfiction.
The Senator synopsis: US Senator Oliver Michaels of Maine campaigned on the hopes of changing Washington. One year after becoming the youngest senator in Congress, the fresh-faced, electrifying speaker finds himself disheartened by systemic bureaucracy, partisan finger-pointing, the power of lobbyist and the impending collapse of his marriage. When New York Times reporter and Oliver’s former college suitemate Alex Broussard shows up at his office, Oliver is presented with a real opportunity to clean up dirty DC politics.
Alex, Oliver, a fellow reporter Coleman, and a small team of allies uncover a corruption scheme involving two Congressmen, the head of the Environmental Protection Agency and a chemical factory. Sacrificing the health and lives of thousands of men, women and children, they knowingly expose an entire community to carcinogenic solvents for the sake of the almighty dollar.
But Alex and Oliver’s efforts to expose the unlawful plot also uncovers the fact that they are players in a rigged game hosted by those who will do anything to keep their positions of power and their wallets padded: even kill. The stakes continuously rise putting Alex, Coleman, Oliver and their family and friends in grave danger. Each must decide what’s more important; the safety of their loved ones or the health of the public.
End of Interview:
For more from Maya Golden visit her website and follow her on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
Get your copy of The Return Trip from Amazon US or Amazon UK.
